[Grunge Rock Hamster]'s diary

1063007  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2009-01-16
Written: (3782 days ago)
Previous in thread: 993853 In Daemon SaDiablo's diary
Next in thread: 1063010

I know what ya mean about not knowing where to pick up again. I wish I would not have kept leaving elftown so much. If I would not have left for such long gaps I would not have forgotten my password in the first place (=_=). Now I don't know what to say to ppl anymore... and I have forgotten whom a lot of ppl are. Oh it's horrible!

725475  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2006-01-02
Written: (4892 days ago)

Breeding Love? Sex to love? A strong desire to connect deeper than pure pleasure. A wonderful love sick disease that passes boundaries. Does the desire to have sex feel better when you have the desire to love? Or maybe I should say intensely stronger? When you enjoy the thought of giving head more than receiving it? Is that lust or love? When you would think about doing things that never crossed your mind before, such as getting a tongue ring or going through with that crazy ladder idea? When the act of hurting yourself to make some one else happy crosses your mind and turns you on… is it love? Is it love when they corrupt you in a good manner? Feeling corruption deep inside. The electricity to have and to hold. To make dreams tangible? Is this what love is? Why do so many just marry who ever they can get their hands on? Why do people not value themselves enough to wait? Are people really that afraid of being alone? ALONE!!! Does the word scare you? It used to scare me, but I have learned so much. I love myself more than I did before him. Is it love to teach some one that? Lust and Love, they go hand in hand. They are not dirty words; both words are just as important as the other. You need both Love and Lust to feel dreams. Like another dimension, you can do whatever you want when you have both. Don’t laminate your soul until you feel it’s good enough to keep!

690365  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2005-10-31
Written: (4954 days ago)

Oh i am sad. i fell over and i can't get up. no matter how hard i try to forget. all i end up doing is thinking more! oh just print my name in red and pronounce me dead! i hate this crushing feeling. my friends are gone, and i never do anything anymore. my words are ignored and cultures build walls... of all the people in this planet... i have crushed myself. i'm the one to blame. i try to little...or i try to hard. i can not find the middle. REJECTED, DENIED, DEFEATED. the words are not even clear yet, but i fear they are there. they are waiting till i am venerable, then they will smother me. PARANOIA, it follows my emotions. 

202985  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2004-04-23
Written: (5511 days ago)
Next in thread: 203814

your Asian beauty shines
you are all lovely lovelies
my beautiful host family
I will learn from you
I will eat with you
you will talk with me
and I will talk with you
we get to know each other
we will live together for two weeks
it will be a wonderful two weeks
the gardens will shine
and the cities will gleam brightly
I will look to you for help
you will to me in hopes of answers
we will share our knowledge of this world
we, two of very different culture and nation will grow to be friends
I will buy you presents
and you will thank me
I will cook with you my lovely host mother
I will write with you my lovely host father
I will teach you my games my lovely host brothers and sisters
we will live as a family for two weeks
then it will end and I will share with my family and town my wonderful stories
I will tell them of your home
I will tell them of your personalities
I will tell them of your town
my friends will listen to my words and giggle at my tales of afar
then I will give them gifts that I bought from you lovely town
they will be happy and smile brightly
I will write you
and maybe you will right me
my wonderful Asian host family

202954  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2004-04-23
Written: (5511 days ago)
Next in thread: 202959, 202963

don't touch me, stay back. keep your sad hands away
don't touch me! stay away, stop it
i hate you, you make my skin cold
keep your hands behind your back
you make me sick
don't touch me
what do i have to say
silent, silent, dead
you are gon and so am i, bliss, bliss
don't touch me with your dirty hands
keep your lips away from me
stay back, keep you sadness away
keep your life and throw me from your thoughts
i dont want your life
don't touch me




54990  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2003-08-10
Written: (5768 days ago)
Next in thread: 202940

Whaaaaa! I’m bored and I’m hungry and my stupid selfish brain is still keeping me up.

Fatal Hugs and Bloody kisses,
Nakita/ShardOfOnyx
.^;.;^.

43696  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2003-07-03
Written: (5806 days ago)

Eee it's now 4:19am in PA. Man I am so not tiered. I’m sleepy but I can’t seem to fall asleep! Oh well, I think I will just watch some Hack_Ddusks_Twilights_Bracelet. Bye diary.

Fatal Hugs and Bloody kisses,
Nakita/ShardOfOnyx
.^;.;^.

43634  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2003-07-03
Written: (5806 days ago)

Wheee I’m like so happy! I spent a day with my friends and my downloads are finished!!! Now I have most of the Ghost in the Shell series, yeah. Man I’m hungry! I swear I’m always hungry! Oh well, I love food. Well cya latter diary.

Fatal hugs and Bloody Kisses,
Nakita/ShardOfOnyx
.^;.;^.

43381  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2003-07-02
Written: (5806 days ago)
Next in thread: 50711

Wow I can’t believe its July!
Man its 5:31am and I am not even tiered yet!!! I’m never tiered during the night!!! I always end up sleeping all day and missing out on everything! *SIGH* oh well at lest I get to sit here and write in this diary thingy... speaking of sitting! This chair is really starting to hurt my butt! I so need to get a nice big comfy chair to sit in. this metal school chair just isn't cutting it any more. Oh well I guess I will go and eat something. I mean since I don’t have anything ells to do? Man I wish I could get to sleep! It’s like I’m trying to force my brain to shut off and it's fighting me! It just does not want to go to sleep. Geez my brain is selfish! What about my body, huh brain!? It wants to sleep and all you can do is think about your self! What a selfish brain I own! Well anyway I think I’m going to go get that food now, Farwell.

Fatal Hugs and Bloody kisses,
Nakita/ShardOfOnyx
.^;.;^.

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