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2008-02-03 02:23:51
Last author: dragonos
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<words>
Tis thou light that wich
hath shown
me right
from hence
once was dark
now am light
and shal fight for what is right
thine nature calls
even through the strongest of walls
thine shal obey and never run away
for tis what be written in thine stars
human's should not have any cars for they hurt thine mother.



Perfect Match

Roses are red violet's are blue there is noone on this planet that can stop me from loveing you,Your eye's are the light that give's me the power to do right, Your hair is as black as the night that can give some people a fright,To me you are perfect despite what other's may think or say for you are my day, You are my perfect angel as I am your perfect devil, We together are the perfect match of oppasites, As we are the same in some aspect's of life, We are as inconstant as the wind, We bend and yeild when we must but as the wind can be calm and peaceful at time's and strong and forceful at other time's we are good & bad like all thing's in life, For we may love some we are also capable hate, So we together are a perfect match!



              (HAPPYNESS)
  

Being alone is not as fun as being with the one whome your heart,body and soul call's out to, butcan hurt when you see the one you love walking with another person and not you, so hope for the best but it may never come for me, i'm cursed with being alone for the rest of my pathetic existaunce, as you can planley see, I wish you and I could be together till the end of time, then I would know to what "True Happyness" is.






            (Truth in the eye of the beholder)

When I look in your eye's I see happieness,love,compasion,peace,contemptment all hiding behind fear,pain and sorrow, I wish you could wipe your mind of all that makes you suffer so much, If you only new how much my heart ackes so when I see you suffer, I wish I could hold you in my arm's and protect you for all time, When your happy I feel as if nothing could ever go wrong but when your sad I feel as though I didn't protect you enough and I want to suffer for my transgretion's, In allowing you to get hurt and believe it's my fault your hurt and suffering and wish I could take all your pain into myself and never allow you to feel any form of pain,harm,fear or suffering, so you could know true happieness!





         [I shal alway's protect you]


If only you new how much my heart ackes when your not around, I wish you and I could be together even after the end of time, so you and I could know true happieness, the time will come when I will be able to speak these word's to you, but for now I shal suffer with only being able to see you from time to time, but when you embrace me with open arms for that brief moment I feel absalute peace and wish that feeling shal never end, for when your in my arms I shal never allow any harm,pain or any other bad thing to happen to you, when I walk with you and someone tries to hurt you I would ask you to turn and look away for I never want to show anger in your precence.







Shadow

Tis for thou love that thine tis a man
For without thou love twould be nothing but a mere shadow
Thou love giveth me wing's
For tis thou heart that make'th thine sing
T'was once inveloped by the dark
Shadowed like a tree's bark
Thou shined thine light
Into the dark
T'was like a glimore of hope
Like a shineing golden rope
Wich gave'th thine power
Like the sun to a flower
Thine now see what may'est be
For thou is like the dove
pure and full of love
Tis no more thine shadow once was
Now and forever t'is shal be what thine shal see.

   

     (Poem or Spell? you be the judge)
I see what is to be,
Though I do'th not know how thyne ancient knoladge continues to flow,
With thine eye's closed usunder thine knoladge continues to grow like thine clap of thunder,
Here do'th thine lay awaiting thine fateful day,
Tis not thine nature but may'est be thine way,
For not of thee thine power and knoladge grow's by three,
So doth thine ancient way continue even in thine present day doth thou say,
As thine river's,rain and time continue to flow,
So may'est thine power,spirit and knoladge continue to grow, Blessed be thine nature blessed be thine way as is written so shal it stay,



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2007-04-29 [dragonos]: First one is not one of my biggest but has alot of meening to it

2007-04-29 [Vampires Anonymous]: there's a lot of love in theses poems. they're great!

2007-04-29 [dragonos]: thank you I like to write poetry about love it makes me feel happy

2007-07-30 [I'm her Georgia *Peach!*]: PROOFREAD. Lots of common misspellings. That's my first critique. Let me finish reading....
Oh, and if you try to make something in a rhyming, symmetrical scheme (Like
I wonder now
Abour you, cow
You are the one
That I see now.

...okay, so it's lame. But each line is four syllables. It rhymes. It's very disorienting having something be 4-7-9-5 and rhyme. @.@ Others are free-verse, and nice. Like the first poem. Good free verse. But, uhm... what's a 'thoa'?? I just can't figure that one out.)

Forgive me if I sound harsh. I don't mean to. but the 'perfect match'... it totally throws me for a loop.First you atart off with a nice 4-4-4-4 piece that rhymes ABCB, but then you make the verses off-balance, and then lose any concept of rhyme whatsoever. I would consider revising it to be either your 4-4-4-4 or a longer-line rhyme scheme, or a free verse. It just confuses me.

Oh, and cliches. Avoid them like the Plague. I mean, they have their uses, but no more than one per poem, please. ^^ It makes a poem lose most of its power.

Honestly? I think these have a lot of potential. I'm itching to revise them to make them pretty.

2007-07-30 [Linderel]: To be completely honest with you... I can't even stand to read these because of the poor grammar and spelling. I'm sure they have potential, but the previous commenter is right. Please, proofread your works.

2007-10-04 [dragonos]: You see that is why I have them that way in there own way's. Not for perfection, Not for grammer, Not completely rhiming, For there own unique style base, Oh before I forget (thoa) as in thoa art a perfect beauty-You are a perfect beauty. As I write my poetry it is not for fame or perfection or even complement's it is to see what each indavidual sees when they read it, For each person has there own opinion they all see thing's differantly. Where one see perfection other's see failure. That is why I have them the way they are. But the way I have thoa in the first poem meen's your.

2007-10-17 [Rising Death Dragon]: dragonos, check out my poem on my house page

2008-02-02 [Mordigen]: *twitches* i think the point they were trying to make is that "thoa" is not an exsistant word......at all.  I think they got what you were trying to say, but it is spelled Thou not thoa.

2008-02-03 [dragonos]: Ok I have done some minner spelling error fixes so if you want re-read them and tell me what you think of them now and if you want you can pop over to my story page and read that and tell me if it sound's ok at best.

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