Come and join Kings of Chaos!
Ok bitches, I've made it. I've finally made it. I'm home and I'm back in a brand new fashion. Watch out Ball-State because I'm bouncing off the walls and snorting pixie stixs to see what kind of effect they will have on my psyche. I'm going to classes and challenging these cozy comfy professors. Reminds me of a fat guy facing off against the tread mill. You know if he worked hard enough that he could do it but he just doesn't have the will power. Speaking of which I wonder if these cushy students can swallow my idea like trying to deep throat the jagged edge of a broken beer bottle. I'll bet the blood oozes down their throat and the world tastes like copper. But the water is sweet where the Wabash River runs but the Gods want me where my heart will soar. Water is on the ground and I'm all air baby. So fly me to the other side of the planet and drop me down where everything seems .... normal.
Just a few funny things that have been said:
I ran over a man of God for dairy products!
T-shirts will save my virginity. No longer will I need to prostitute myself to lesbians.
Thats getting fucked in the ass with spit instead of lube.
On a subject... for I have started to write again....
Indiana. Lost, Lonely, cornfield ridden Indiana. Indiana boredom, borderline balance, breaking the boundaries of a man's body. From a green home with a white door, across the streets from rustling cornfield, the wind carries the stink of madness, whispering sinister languages through the silk, emerges the antagonist of our story, faceless except in dream. Closing the white door of a little girl's world.
Bright brown eyed girl. Beaming beautiful smiled girl. Blossoming mind. Broken. Fragmented as she scrubbes the reminants of him from her Little Mermaid panties. His sex, mixed with her blood. Eyes more wized stare, hollow, at the fogging reflection, her tiny feet chilled at the touch of tile. Her smile tainted by the salty taste of his skin on her tongue. Clawing, clumsy, trying to remove the oozing mixture of snot and seamen. Shaking, trembling, inhale.
Sinking into the the water, it rushes through her scalp, over her skin, cascading through her body, merging with the last of her innocence. She watchs the last of it leak and drip from her body, mezmerized by it's swirl and curl, changing the water into a rosy hue. His reflection engraved in the blackness behind her eyes. Inhales, hoping that some of her innocence will be absorbed back into her skin. Maybe she can emerge whole again.
Inhale as the sounds of the world dull, and she can no longer hear her heart break. Only beat. The world dims, and the engraved image captures her again, in a violent embrace in a place where she can never escape. I inhale as the water rushes over my body again. I scrub and scrub. I have to come to accept that his smell is now a part of my DNA pattern. It will always be with me. I can feel the torrent of water rush over the folds of my sex, soothing the aches and rawness it finds. I suppose that I will always be that little girl, forever waiting to be put back together. Forever waiting to exhale.
If you understand... I'll be waiting ...
Oh, somewhere deep inside of these bones
An emptiness began to grow
There's something out there, far from my home
A longing that I've never known.
Oh somewhere deep inside of my bones
An empty place began to grow
The fame and praise come year after year
Does nothing for my empty tears
-Nightmare before Christmas
WHAT I'VE GIVEN
I danced at the horizon of the world, on the edge of a knife
And I gave my wings to you
Before I could fly
Now I can only dance
Your lost fallen angel
My wings removed
I can no longer feel the air between my feathers
But I can remember, and I can still feel
I can still dance
My wings removed
So that I could be with you
But there are somethings your love cannot give back
And thats why I dance
I dance until my body breaks
To a beat, a heartbeat that can heal my heart
My soul yearns for the sky
But my legs are on the ground
I love you
I gave up my wings for you
But there are somethings your love cannot replace
And that is why I dance
"I have been told that there is an adult world, a world children do not understand; therefore I cannot begin to explain to you why I have come to live in this world."
"I am. But I am the only one to blame for that. Actually loneliness has a kind of fascination; it's a state of egotistical, inner grace that you can achieve only by standing guard on old, forgotten roads that no one travels anymore."
-The Fencing Master
"It is an infantile superstition of the human spirit that virginity would be thought a virtue and not the barrier that separates ignorance from knowledge."