this is the last one of the year... cuz have to make one entry per year... i am just crazy like that...
well today kinda sux... i wont be home all day... i gotta work and all that bullshit. i had a meeting with my Probation Officer and she is a bitch most of the time.... she says one thing to your face and does another behind your back... but i wont be home and that is a good thing and a bad thing at the same time.... i wont have to deal with my dad but i DO have to work and wont get to sit...:( i find it kinda sad though... the ones whom i fall in love with are the ones that could never have worked out... and for this i cry inside and wish for death.... but at the same time, i hope that one of them will work and one of these people that say they love will actually mean it and be true... then i will be happy. This is why i go on living. but my one fear, the only thing i am afraid of is not death itself, it is the condition of my death and if i found my TRUE love or not. i probably sound female right now going all "gushy" as some people would put it... but i dont really care... and i am done.