[banu]'s diary

761957  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2006-03-11
Written: (3083 days ago)

Attavagga - The Self

If one holds oneself dear, one should protect oneself well. During every one of the three watches the wise man should keep vigil.

759924  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-03-07
Written: (3087 days ago)

I cant remember each words I have recieved, it is because of my forgetful mind...It is too hard to all human beings to control their mind If they can say some wrong words...It is just like lapsus...A friend always says that all lapsuses we do talks instead of us...But we HAVE to remember a reality...You can do lapsus If English is not your nature language...and you cant express yourself freely in other languages you can talk...
Then, can we blame anyone If they cant express their nature and real being?I know that It will take a long time to forget all my sorrows...But something was special for me...I wished that something was special for him too...I remember some words which were said by a friend:

We wont be same after this meeting...

I am adding a sentence:

I will NEVER be same after this separateness... 

759785  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-03-07
Written: (3088 days ago)

Arahantavagga - The Perfected One

He who corruptions are destroyed, he who is not attached to food, he who has Deliverance, which is Void and Signless, as his objects, - his path, like that of birds in the air, cannot be traced.

Jaravagga - Old Age

What is laughter, what is joy, when the world is ever burning? Shrouded by darkness, would you not seek the light?

759254  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2006-03-06
Written: (3089 days ago)

Cittavagga - The Mind

Like a fish that is drawn from its watery abode and thrown upon land, even so does this mind flutter. Hence should the realm of the passions be shunned.

The mind is hard to check. It is swift and wanders at will. To control it is good. A controlled mind is conducive to happiness.

It is from Buddhism...

758439  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2006-03-04
Written: (3090 days ago)

"There is happiness in life,
happiness in friendship,
happiness of a family,
happiness in a healthy body and mind,
...but when one loses them, there is suffering."
              
                   Dhammapada

758017  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2006-03-03
Written: (3091 days ago)

I am really in shock... Because there is hate... Hate...

Hate??!

What did I do to deserve this? Did I kill anyone? Did I annoy anyone with sexual intention? Did I REALLY manipulate anyone? I am a manipulative person and also blocked member!!! How an adult human being allows anyone to manipulative himself? Can it be true? What a beautiful birthday to me!!! I have learnt alot of new things in my new age... You shouldnt believe anyone easily... You shouldnt trust anyone easily... You shouldnt ADMIRE anyone easily... You listen to what they want to say but you are NOT allowed to be listened by someone!!! I am asking where the respect is?? You want to recieve a respect but you show your respect with such a way? Is it fair?? No, this is not fair... Even A murderer has a deserving to defend himself and it is that speaking and being LISTENED... I wonder If I think that I am only human being on earth?? or someone?

But, unfortunately there is no hate in my heart... I cant hate anyone... It is not my REAL nature... I cant do anything or I cant change anything If someone wants to believe that I am manipulative person...Because The unique thing human being can change is herself/himself... I cant change anyone because I dont want to change anyone...

I think I have grown up one more age... Is it enough for someone?
 
757817  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2006-03-03
Written: (3092 days ago)

The unique thing human being can change is herself/himself...

757765  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2006-03-03
Written: (3092 days ago)

Tomorrow, It is my birthday...I know all my friends will say "Happy Birthday"...Except one...I am melancholic...I am getting old but It is not viotual problem...I am alone and It is my choice I believe...I am confused, I have limited...The worst thing is that I can not do anything... 

757754  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2006-03-03
Written: (3092 days ago)

Soyez à vous-même votre propre flambeau, votre propre refuge... "
- Bouddha

Si vous ne prenez pas du temps pour vous,

qui le fera à votre place ... ??


vén. Shinjin

Robert Brandt-Diény

757704  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2006-03-03
Written: (3092 days ago)

"...nous devons croire à un écrit, à une doctrine ou à une affirmation lorsque notre raison et notre expérience intime les confirment. C'est pourquoi, je vous ai enseigné à ne pas croire simplement d'après ce qui vous a été dit, mais conformément à votre expérience personnelle, et puis à agir en conséquence et généreusement".

Citation tirée de "La Doctrine secrète", tome III.

757696  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2006-03-03
Written: (3092 days ago)

Karma



Islam :

Aucun de vous n'est digne de se prétendre croyant s'il ne désire pas pour son frère ce qui est bon pour lui-même.

(Sunnah)

Bouddhisme :

N'offensez pas les autres, de sorte que vous ne soyez pas offensés.

(Udana-Varga 5: 18)
757429  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2006-03-02
Written: (3092 days ago)

Loving is painful, The truth is painful
They resemble eachother...

The hardest thing on earth is losing someone you love ...If they passed away, you try to bear with your loss...It is painful...But you know that they have gone somewhere and they are in your prayers until your breath stops...

But If you lose someone and you KNOW that they are alive...It is the most painful things in your life...You know they are still alive, breathe...But you cant talk ANY word to them...If your loss passed away, you can talk to him/her in your dreams...But If he/she is alive, you cant talk to him/her anymore...It hurts your heart...There is a big hole in your heart...You cant fill it...Because this place in your heart BELONGS to him/her...Your heart ACHES...But this pain which is in your heart will never recover...Because you cant take a pill for your ache...Your soul CRY silently... This crying will never stop...You cant wipe tears of your soul...

The thing I feel is just pain... There is no hate... There is no anger... Because feeling hate or anger is not my REAL nature... My heart is still crying... Throughout I look at this page, It will continue crying...

I wish that you will read these words, one day...
God bless you...
Banu  

738854  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2006-01-26
Written: (3128 days ago)

Mariah Carey - Without You

No I can't forget this evening
Or your face as you were leaving
But I guess that's just the way
The story goes

You always smile
But in your eyes
Your sorrow shows
Yes it shows

No I can't forget tomorrow
When I think of all my sorrow
When I had you there
But then I let you go

And now it's only fair
That I should let you know
What you should know

I can't live
If living is without you
I can't live
I can't give anymore
I can't live
If living is without you
I can't give
I can't give anymore

Well I can't forget this evening
Or your face as you were leaving
But I guess that's just the way
The story goes

You always smile
But in your eyes
Your sorrow shows
Yes it shows

"It is a wonderful song i like...I have wanted to share its lyrics"

737474  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2006-01-23
Written: (3131 days ago)

I have read a poem which was sent by my beloved friend Inge and it has impressed me so much...I would like to share it with all my friends...

DO NOT STAND AT MY GRAVE AND WEEP

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there, I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glint on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you wake in the morning hush,
I am the swift, uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft starlight at night.

Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
(Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there, I did not die!
Mary Frye (1932)

736715  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2006-01-22
Written: (3132 days ago)
Next in thread: 736796

Sometimes, i think about if i lose my dreams...If i lose them, what will happen to me? Is "the day i am dead" that day? I know i ask alot, because i am curious and this is the way to learn being alive and living the life...All questions i have are almost about my dreams...If all of them make me not fair, i am ready for everything...

I have lost my dear friend Jon and this loss has made me so sad and thoughtful of everything...You see some one everyday and they are a part of your life but you are not aware of their worth...Sometimes, you say "a hello" and this is enough behaviour for you...You know that you love them by all your heart but the runing hither and yon doesnt allow to say them how much you are awaring of them and love them...One day, you have lost one of them and you havent been saying anything...Being aware of THIS loss makes you so sad...

I am really sad for my loss...I am praying for you, Jon...Now, you are playing with angels and you are smiling to us...

MAY YOUR SOUL REST IN PEACE...
I WILL NEVER FORGET YOU...  

732381  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2006-01-14
Written: (3140 days ago)

Someone was to ask "Abidin Dino" who is an art if he could paint picture of happiness and he was to paint a picture which includes a dad, a mum, 7 children on the same bed, a dog, a rooster...The house on this picture is really bad...There is no another bed to sleep and all parent sleeps on the same bed...But if you pay attention about his picture, they seem really happy...The money is nothing if you dont have the love, the money doesnt work if you dont have health, the money is not enough to buy if you are alone...I have known someone who follows the money way...I have never been one of them...I have never followed the money way...I have believed the power of love, not the power of money...I am looking for TRUE love...I know it hiddens in somewhere I have not known yet...
If you are not shallow person, you have HIGH emotions about life...If you believe that you have a INNER REALM, i am here and my house opens for all you...
LOVE IS A TEMPLE... 

732376  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2006-01-14
Written: (3140 days ago)

No, I have never lied down eternity...No; In my life I have never lied down eternity until this day...But I dont know eternity, I did not see it and know it...I know boundaries, being limited, limitings; I know being paralysed, growing less-becoming less, becoming crippled...No no, no I can say that I dont know what the eternity is, certainly...

Melissa P.
"Dragonfly comes in the night"  

726175  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2006-01-03
Written: (3151 days ago)

He is alive...

724841  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2006-01-01
Written: (3153 days ago)

I am really so bad right now...I have just learnt Jon([xm3]) is dead...It is like an awful joke...It cant be true i have to believe...I cant believe that...I cant find  any word talking about it...I am so bad...

I will never forgive you, Jon...I will never forget you, Jon...

 The logged in version 

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