[lacklustre]'s diary

1169093  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2015-02-19
Written: (2116 days ago)

Oh I forgot my place, thanks for letting me know your opinion. I will not follow it, especially if it lessens my worth or the worth of others. Equality even at an inconvenience!

1168785  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2014-12-21
Written: (2176 days ago)

Happy level up day people. Ya'll know who you are.

1168717  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2014-12-13
Written: (2184 days ago)

Today, yesterday; it has been one long continuous day. I need to settle myself down. Anxiety is a bucking bronco that just needs to be shot. I hate anxiety.

1168217  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2014-11-01
Written: (2226 days ago)
1168195  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2014-10-30
Written: (2228 days ago)

Restless, my heart yearns for things far off.

1167832  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2014-10-12
Written: (2247 days ago)

my ears ring to the silence.

1167662  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2014-10-03
Written: (2255 days ago)

I survived a violent ass thunder storm that almost turned into a tornado. It destroyed powerlines, fences and launched debris into apartments. Wood and concrete were not a match for the elements. It was terrifying.

1167608  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2014-09-29
Written: (2259 days ago)

The silence at this hour of the void bites me.

1167586  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2014-09-27
Written: (2261 days ago)

Had to go to the Er last week. Waited 3 hours to be seen, had an infection. Got expensive ass medicine, spent the week in seclusion. Still recovering wonderfully, I am thankful I got badass friends abroad! Though I am mostly silent, I am usually vigilant. Good luck friends! I hope ya'll are having a wonderful weekend of world map traveling and adventure.

1166174  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2014-08-04
Written: (2315 days ago)

The fadeaway is worse than death.

1165817  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2014-07-11
Written: (2339 days ago)

I am talking don't dismiss what I am saying. Pay attention, there will be a quiz.

1165513  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2014-05-28
Written: (2383 days ago)

I've got a grand silence and ringing in my ears.

1163195  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2013-11-16
Written: (2576 days ago)

Rage is something that must be contained, even when others are looking to provoke it's wrath. Don't assume that because I see things differently that I am mentally incompetent. It will only put you out when you need help the most.

1162316  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2013-09-19
Written: (2634 days ago)

The long silence.

1161895  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2013-08-20
Written: (2664 days ago)
Next in thread: 1161915

lord help me.

1161432  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2013-07-22
Written: (2693 days ago)

why are these nights always so long?

1161199  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2013-07-07
Written: (2708 days ago)

The lateness of hour makes the earliest of mornings. Exhaustion is but a term used by the weak to describe the sensation of loneliness and fatigue at the hands insomnia. Yet I know this, yet it matters not, my design in this scheme small and foreboding to the things that are to come. Portentially, potentially a long a time coming since the mark has been made, waiting for a trigger, I'll be taking the initiative.

1160195  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2013-05-19
Written: (2757 days ago)

I wish I was indestructible when the hurt comes a rumbling.
It doesn't matter how much damage the frame takes when heart break hit's like a wrecking ball.
A blow felled is still a stumble and a humbling to a knee when I want to stand proud.
Got all the time in the world and patience isn't going to have it my way.
I'll shrug it all soon enough when the weight gets to be too much but till then I'm carrying a world of hurt.
Tough shit isn't impossible to overcome, but come on when it's time to dare I better win.

1157623  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2013-02-09
Written: (2856 days ago)
Next in thread:

Cold. Tired. Need warmth.

1157181  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2013-01-25
Written: (2871 days ago)

I've started the new year on the defensive. Constantly having to exile myself since others will not stand with me as the tide approaches. Even with limited employment it's been hard and I am struggling to keep a smile on my face even just for formalities sake. I would say that I am 'trying' but to say, "I try" means to invite failure. Failure may be the foundation of success but too much of it is like cancer. So I will continue to do what I can until I cannot do anymore then I pray someone will gather the wherewithal to stand with me and help me to my feet when I hit the pavement. I would say I trust but that's a word that's as scarce as love; fleeting and cherished when it's expressed.

1155618  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2012-11-30
Written: (2927 days ago)
 The logged in version 

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