Page name: The Town Herald - Issue 17 [Logged in view] [RSS]
2008-08-05 20:27:17
Last author: Hedda
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The Town Herald


The netpaper about Elftowners, by Elftowners, for Elftowners.



Enter Issue 17:

TH Issue 17 Index




Credits: Thanks to all of our current Heralders, contributing retired Heralders, all our guest submissions and of course our featured Artists and Writers.

Cover Art by: Elftown Artist [liiga]

Username (or number or email):


2008-08-05 [Terrence Cain]: Beautiful artistry, Liiga. I am in complete awe.

2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...

2008-08-05 [elfprincess021]: beautiful artwork. luv it!

2008-08-05 [Hedda]: You just like breasts! <img:stuff/zabuN-gif.gif>

2008-08-05 [x-tacy]: hec even i like the breast... who wldnt?

2008-08-05 [Hedda]: Nothing to argue about there. <img:stuff/cheshmak.gif> I just wanted to get them to say something about the other part of the artwork, but I guess that's out of the question now as it seems like talk about breasts never ever stops. Especially girls never stop when they get going! Real breasts-lovers like horny boys or hungry babies at least get bored of it after a while... <img:stuff/zabuN-gif.gif>

2008-08-05 [x-tacy]: yep you are right about that one lol..mayor....

2008-08-06 [Talos Cyrion]: I think it reminds me alittle of galadriel from Lord of the rings....and (don't ask me where or how im getting this) it reminds me of some battle feild dark elf comander drinking in the spiols of her victory, it's a nice peice sufice to say

2008-08-06 [DREAM of BLUE]: what a girl.....can say only PERFECT art

2008-08-06 [Psycho1]: wow

2008-08-07 [EnigmaFlame]: Hmm...excellent!

2008-08-07 [Paul Doyle]: It's good to see a resurgence of OLD SCHOOL Elftown . . . now this hearkens back to the Elftown I fondly remember! :D

2008-08-07 [Cia_mar]: i would say that this is one of my favorites of [liiga]'s work!
flawless...great textures, lighting (the golden glow enhances the feeling of this being perhaps a moment of magical transformation,,, or just a golden moment in the dawn sun) over all it is superb work!

glad to see it as a cover for this issue

2008-08-10 [iRock.]: awww, you're cute.

2008-08-11 [Terror and Hubris]: i like bewbs

2008-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: She should really invest in a bra...

2008-08-11 [iRock.]: I'm gunna hurt you Mortified Penguin.

2008-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: What? Look at those things... they need some support...

2008-08-11 [iRock.]: I do have a bra on, LOOK CLOSER!

2008-08-13 [Dark Side of the Moon]: [Talos Cyrion]: I think it reminds me alittle of galadriel from Lord of the rings....

When I first saw this I thought of Galadriel also. I just can't get over the perfection of the artwork!

2008-08-13 [Terror and Hubris]: Shes not naked, it's not perfect yet.

2008-08-13 [Talos Cyrion]: -_- is that all that matters? And honestly does it really matter if she has a bra on or not mortified penguin? why are you even looking is my question?

2008-08-13 [Mordigen]: thats how mort is - try to ignore it rather than take it personally.

i think it's the over-exposure to ramen ...

2008-08-13 [Talos Cyrion]: I know....and i don't take it personally i just find rather tacky that people have to point it out...instead of keeping it to themselves

2008-08-13 [Terror and Hubris]: what? boobs are the greatest thing since Raptor Jesus. And honestly, people need to stop being uncomftorable when people point out boobs. Oh haha, look she has boobs. Everyone join in, because boobs are awesome. This is the INTERNET, you're going to get some less than savory individuals.

2008-08-13 [iRock.]: Oh sheepers.
Lets just all start a riot over... my boobs.
I WEAR BRAS. End o' story.

2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Just sayin'... those things look pretty saggy... I'll bet she has back problems too... *eats ramen*...

2008-08-13 [EnigmaFlame]: O.O ....

2008-08-13 [SilverFire]: [iRock.] what are you on about? Mort is talking about the picture, not you. No need to start swearing, either.

2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah... from the look of it, your boobs aren't big enough to have back problems... at least not yet anyway... *eats ramen*... Silverfire, though... she's got some huge ones! ......but, anyway......

2008-08-13 [EnigmaFlame]: *the lights flicker I appear beside kymerlye and hands her an battleaxe* End Mort... <img:2706_1128818519.gif>

2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! But... I just finished paying off my mortgage!

2008-08-13 [EnigmaFlame]: *makes a phone call to Solus to come and destroy Mort*

2008-08-13 [SilverFire]: Well if you get mad stop typing, because we don't want any rudeness here. Especially when it's uncalled for because you completely misunderstood him anyway.

And Mort, you can stop antagonising her too, now.

2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: That's not true... I have a big ego! That... and my twelve incher. *rubs his barrel*... yup... this sure is a good gun!

2008-08-13 [SilverFire]: [Terror and Hubris]: I deleted your comment. It didn't help anything at all and was only rude. There's no reason for you to get involved, and your comment would have only made things worse.

2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: That was a pretty big comment... probably took a while to make...

2008-08-13 [EnigmaFlame]: I was going to say axe instead of battleaxe and I left it an "an" so I apologize for my transgression. And yes im an an internet tough guy but thats just the way I am

2008-08-13 [Terror and Hubris]: Oh come on. That comment would have single handedly solved the problem.

2008-08-13 [SilverFire]: Okay, if none of you are going to stop being idiots, then I'll just start deleting your comments until you've learned some manners, and decide to start being polite. Because this really isn't the place for your silly whining and bitching. That clear? :) If you have a problem with Mort, Kymberlye then you should report it to the guards so we can handle it, instead of just being rude back, because that will just get you into trouble, too. And yes, you did misunderstand him: he wasn't talking about your boobs in half these comments, but you responded as if he were.

Now this can all end now, and we can all get back to admiring the beautiful art work. ;)

2008-08-13 [EnigmaFlame]: I cant just let that happen so easily<img:2706_1128818519.gif>

2008-08-13 [EnigmaFlame]: Wow the CIA <img:2706_1128818519.gif>

2008-08-13 [EnigmaFlame]: Raise your swords up high!
See the black birds fly!
Let them hear your rage!
Show no fear!

Im stealing this page! It is mine! <img:2706_1128818519.gif>

2008-08-13 [Talos Cyrion]: All this over one art peice? good lord!!!

2008-08-13 [EnigmaFlame]: Yes cause it is fun, let us war for ages!
Charge your horses across the fields!
Together we ride into destiny!
Have no fear of death, when its our time!

2008-08-14 [Talos Cyrion]: charge forth to death and twilight ride ever to the end shall we deny as we never shall we die!!!

2008-08-14 [iRock.]: awww, I love you guys.

2008-08-14 [Paul Doyle]: Wow, randomly RPG'ing over this? I guess AD&D 4.0 must suck that much o_O

[liiga] proves the pen (or the digital paintbrush!) is truly mightier than the sword, and, well, in keeping in the spirit of these comments which are threatened with deletion: maybe the Helen of Troy factor, as well? (Horndogs going to war over a beautiful woman, that is.)

2008-08-14 [iRock.]: How romantic?

2008-08-15 [x-tacy]: how in the world did you mistake Mort. from talking about the picture to talking about your boobs thats the funniest thing i've seen on here he did not say even once anything about your boobs... that is some mis understanding for like something that would happen to me....

2008-08-16 [iRock.]: I never said I was all the way there..
you know, I'm the dumbest blond with brown hair you could ever meet..
I don't think about things.. and when I realized that there was actually a damn picture up there.. I felt sooo stupid.
Oh gosh... That just like out dumbed myself.. really it did. And really, I seriously Appologize about anything I did..
Oh wow.
I'm sitting here laughing at myself for how dumb I am.
I'm glad you were amused.

2008-08-17 [Imperator]: Wow, did the council honostly have to come in and mediate an argument over breasts? That should be a record of some kind...

2008-08-17 [iRock.]: I have no idea what you just said..
but, sure, it can be a record of some kind.. I think.. :/

2008-08-18 [Mordigen]: Alex, hun, the council never stepped in :P [SilverFire] is a Heralder too, and was only doing Herlad duties by trying to keep our front page clean ;P

and seriously guys -- don't take it out on her, I would have deleted all your comments too if I were here online while they were happening -- she has my full and complete support in mediating this situation, and I greatly appreciate her doing so in my abscence.

Lets all be pleasant now :)

2008-08-18 [Imperator]: I just think it's really funny how this revolved around breasts and a misunderstanding. :D

2008-08-18 [Mordigen]: Isn;t there always going to be a misunderstanding when something revolves around breasts ? XD

2008-08-18 [Imperator]: 0.0 *quietly backs out of room*

2008-08-18 [x-tacy]: [iRock.] u are not dumb u are just funny very

2008-08-18 [EnigmaFlame]: War!! BOOM!!

2008-08-18 [iRock.]: Awwwe, thanks. [x-tacy]
But, the only funny that I am, is funny looking.

2008-08-18 [x-tacy]: POW POW POW!!! SUPER EXPLOSION!!

2008-08-18 [EnigmaFlame]: Yeeeeah! *Roars* May it rain the blood of our enemies!

2008-08-19 [iRock.]: Can it really do that?
That would be ubber amazing.

2008-08-19 [EnigmaFlame]: You just have to spill enough blood so that it evaporates and then turns to clouds and rains.

2008-08-19 [iRock.]: Can I just go up in a plane and like have ubber amounts of blood.. and like drop it?

would that work?

2008-08-19 [EnigmaFlame]: Yeah but my way is real

2008-08-19 [iRock.]: Me too.
Kill the losers, then put their blood in like buckets and Drop it..
heckle yeasssh.

2008-08-19 [Imperator]: 0.0 *quietly backs out of room again*

2008-08-19 [iRock.]: I was seriously joking by the way..
I'm too good of person to ever do that to anyone..
not matter if I don't like them or not..
Just wrong written all over it.

2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *noisily backs out of the room, stumbling over an inconveniently placed turtle*

2008-08-19 [iRock.]: Watch out, I put that poor little guy there..
he bites.

2008-08-19 [Mordigen]: Mort, I told you about trying to walk backwards while drunk.

here, sit down and eat your ramen, your causing a rucus.

2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Ramen?! ...gross! ...*eats pizza*...

2008-08-19 [iRock.]: What a about Macaroni and Cheese? Mmmmmmm.
Yummy in Kimmy's Tummy. xD

2008-08-20 [Imperator]: OMG! I love Macaroni!!

2008-08-20 [iRock.]: That's my favorite! xD
I just had it for supper.
Heeeeell yeeeeeeah. :]]

2008-08-20 [Mordigen]: Ya know, call me a dork -- but those shaped-images Kraft boxes of macaroni, for some reason, taste so much better. I guess they cook differently?

I eat Spongebob Mac & Cheese. I'm a dork I know, but I have a 2 y/o son, I have an excuse :P

2008-08-20 [EnigmaFlame]: I wish macaroni came in black with red cheese...

2008-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Everyone knows that shells is the best kind of macaroni.

2008-08-21 [iRock.]: Oh..
Then I'm a two year old kid... actually, I'll be fifteen in October..
and I eat my almost year old nephew's baby snacks..
I can't help that they're good. xD

My grandma makes a mean Macaroni and Cheese..
Ooo, if I could I would send some to all ya'll.
but unfortunately.. I can't.

2008-08-21 [Mordigen]: I don't like homemade mac n cheese......i know that sounds crazy, but it is just never good enough. It comes out like a casserole, not actual pasta --- when I'm in the mood for mac and cheese, I want CHEESEY, GOOEY extra-cheesey cheesey macaroni.........not a baked casserole. I'll eat that when I'm in the mood for a casserole :P
it's just not the same, it shouldn't even be in the same category together.

2008-08-22 [iRock.]:
No, seriously, my grandma puts like 5 pounds of cheese, it's soo yummy, I wish I could eat all of what she cooks, but oooo Toooo much, Kimmy's Tummy can't take all that yummy goodness.
I love all macaroni and cheese, as long as it is cheesey. xD

Speaking of cheese, my little brother who is almost fourteen eats cheese and peanut butter together.. for a sandwhich.. How disgusting..

2008-08-23 [~The Wild One In Your Dreams~]: yeah thats a little disgusting

2008-08-24 [iRock.]: He thinks is delicious.

2008-08-24 [Imperator]: I think I'll go try that... Right now in fact.

2008-08-24 [Imperator]: Hmmmmm. It's nothing special. It doesn't taste good but it's not bad either. Maybe I need a different kind of cheese...

2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh please... when you're poor and lazy like me, you end up eating all kinds of strange crap! I've even eaten a dorito, cheese, and ketchup sandwich before... and peanut butter, cheese, and bananas... and that one weird whipped cream sandwich... *eats pizza*...

2008-08-24 [Imperator]: Um, are you harping on me for not liking cheese and peanut butter together? :S

2008-08-24 [Imperator]: Okay, I tried it again and liked it more this time.

2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Harping? No... Violining? ...also no. That's just weird! ...Electric guitaring...? ...yes.

2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm gonna go try it too! ...and I'll one up you! ...I'll dunk it in milk!

2008-08-24 [Imperator]: Ewwww! Okay, I'll do that too.

2008-08-24 [Imperator]: Well, I dunked it in milk and that didn't hurt the taste at all. Although it didn't add much either. I think I'm using flavors that are too weak...

2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh yeah?! I'll dunk mine in... orange juice!

2008-08-24 [Imperator]: You should put ketchup on cottage cheese. I did that once in 2nd grade and never forgot it...

2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... *eats corn and mayo*...

2008-08-24 [Imperator]: What?! That's not gross! Mayo is so close to butter it would still taste good. Cheater.

2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Fine! *eats corn and mustard*

2008-08-24 [Imperator]: Okay, that would be icky... *just finished cheese and peanut butter sandwhich*

2008-08-24 [iRock.]:
Oh geez, you two are sick for even trying that..
I about puke when he eats it..
let alone try it myself.. gross.
I can't even eat butter without puking..
Chips and ketchup is pretty tastey, but they have to be lays in order for it to taste good. xD

2008-08-25 [Imperator]: Chips and ketchup? That's not gross but it's kinda wierd. And butter is awesome.

2008-08-25 [iRock.]: Ewww, yuck.
OR chips and Mayo. mmmm.

Waiit a minute here.
How the heck did we get on the subject of food?

2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *dips butter sticks in mayonnaise*

2008-08-25 [iRock.]: That's disgusting.
I can eat like butter on pancakes, but nothing else, if I get it on my finger when I'm cooking or something, and I don't know it and then lick my finger, I gag.. it's sooo nasty.

I like ranch and Mayo. :]]
My specialty.

2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: That'll teach you to lick strange things off your finger!

2008-08-25 [iRock.]: I never have strange things on my fingers.
What kind of person do you think I am? :]]

I usually don't lick my fingers, but sometimes, it's a habbit.. because I always eat with my fingers.. like if I were to eat pinapple.. I eat them with my fingers. :]

2008-08-25 [Mordigen]: Ok, I think it's time to change the subject...

2008-08-25 [EnigmaFlame]: I am curious where this convo will end up<img:2706_1128818519.gif>

2008-08-25 [iRock.]: I wasn't ment to be perverted.. Mort was..
I was just stating a fact about myself. :]]

2008-08-25 [EnigmaFlame]: I thought about KFC Chicken :)

2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh sure... start claiming I'm perverted again... *eats ramen*...

2008-08-25 [EnigmaFlame]: Mort is perverted again

2008-08-25 [iRock.]: Nothing is wrong with being a pervert.. I just wasn't being perverted at that particular moment. :]

You know what.. I'm gunna eat all those Ramen whatever things, so you can't eat anymore of them! :D

2008-08-25 [EnigmaFlame]: *devours a cow* ahh tasty.

2008-08-25 [iRock.]: Daaaang son,
You must be hungry..

I call dibs on the pig! :D

2008-08-25 [EnigmaFlame]: Fine... *chews on the leg of a boar*

2008-08-25 [iRock.]: I said.
I call dibs on the damn pig!

2008-08-25 [EnigmaFlame]: oops... *steal kims shoe and retreats into the dark corner chewing it* O.O

2008-08-25 [iRock.]: xD
You're lucky my feet don't smell!
or, you would have some rugged smellin' shoes.

by the by; my name is Kimberly, Kim.. xD

2008-08-25 [EnigmaFlame]: *Waves a claw quickly correcting my "error"* What do you mean? I have spelled it correctly. *eats the shoe*

2008-08-26 [iRock.]: Uh, huh.
sure, I don't care that you spell is Kym.. but I just correct people.. I hate how it's spelled Kim.. but eh.. it's my enitials.. I better love it. :D

Oh hell, call me what you want.. I'll answer to it. :]

2008-08-26 [EnigmaFlame]: Hmm... Someone think of a very descriptive long name

2008-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: My name is Inocencio, but nobody calls me that... *eats ramen*...

2008-08-26 [iRock.]: Kimberly Ida M.
As in, KIM. heck yeah.

people just call me IDAho.

2008-08-26 [EnigmaFlame]: Daravir of the limitless black pits of the eternal beyond. Sounds nice, doesnt it?

2008-08-26 [iRock.]: Yeah; it's romantic..

2008-08-26 [EnigmaFlame]: No romantic would be... Daravir of the bloodstained black rose of aguish or something. I can sit here and make up hundreds. But I must depart. Merry met, my friends

2008-08-26 [iRock.]: I was being a smartass, by the way.
I can make hundreds up also, yet, none of them involve my name.. Or like bloodstained black rose or black pits.. they're more like poem sayings.. intelligent huh?

2008-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: You people have some messed up love lifes...

2008-08-26 [iRock.]: Hey, that's not my love lifee.

Oh, and like you have anything to say, you're romantic meal would probably be ramen noodles.

2008-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: With rose petals on top! ...and maybe a traditional, romantic meatball. The kind you nudge to your date with your nose... but then there was that one time... I was nudging the meatball, when, tragically, I felt this sneeze coming on.........

2008-08-26 [iRock.]: Smartass.
This isn't Lady and the Tramp.

And I hope you don't take girls out on dates for fucking spagetti.

2008-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn straight I don't! ...They take me out if they know what's good for them!

2008-08-26 [iRock.]: Yeah, then you probably don't get any dates at all.

I mean, they are lining up at your front door.

2008-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: That's why I have to double bolt my door... some women can just get so desperate, you know...? ...*eats ramen*...

2008-08-26 [iRock.]: You mean; You can get so desperate..
and the girls double bolt their doors?

I'm sorry; that is mean.. but I had to say it.
You can't eat any more ramen noodles; I ate them all!

2008-08-26 [Mordigen]: hey, wait a minute.........what's wrong with spaghetti?
i mean - im not a pasta girl, but sheesh, those italian restaurants will serve you ragu at 400% profit, meaning : expensive date XD

2008-08-27 [iRock.]: Haha,
True, but that's not the romantic type. :]
I would rather have Macaroni and Cheese.. even if it's not romantic.. I don't like tomatos.. nasty crap.

Dude, Mort, did you know that [~Crimson Angel~] made a wikki about haters of you?
I think it's called Bash Mort. or something like that, I just read it on her diary.
That's not very nice.

2008-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, I know about it... don't forget to join!

Bash Mort!

2008-08-27 [iRock.]: Why would I?
I don't hate you.
IF I did, I wouldn't talk to you. Now would I?
You're just different..

2008-08-27 [Duke Devlin]: Mort is ace. ;) He's not just different, he's SUPER different. :P Now, we should all stop spamming the Herald wiki. :P

2008-08-27 [EnigmaFlame]: I declare this wiki mine, for I have stolen it. <img:2706_1128818519.gif>

2008-08-27 [Duke Devlin]: *applauds* .. No fighting that logic. XD

2008-08-27 [iRock.]: And there is nothing wrong with being different; what so ever.
But, what if I wanted to steal it.. that's not fair.

2008-08-27 [EnigmaFlame]: Argh. Im Discussing the uses of mechs in the military with some other people right now.

2008-08-27 [iRock.]: Uhm.. Thanks?
Whatever you just said.. must be interesting.

2008-08-28 [Paul Doyle]: Remember when we were discussing [liiga]'s artistic boobies?

Just sayin' o__O

2008-08-28 [iRock.]: Haha..
Make fun of the nonsmart one. :]
I'm telling my mommy on you!
That's not nice!

2008-08-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of Boobies, Charlie Brown: Smokin' Deuces was just updated at CB5!

2008-08-28 [Paul Doyle]: At first glance it looked like a group of Warhammer lizardfolk in that last panel, dwarfed by one of those weird hyper-inflated furries.

2008-08-28 [Paul Doyle]: I mean, last panel of first page :P

2008-08-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Good! That's what I was going for.

2008-09-03 [EnigmaFlame]: The word original is not fully capable of describing that.

2009-07-02 [Cia_mar]: anyone Know how to let [liiga] know that her pic is being used here:
dont know if she knew it or not

2009-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: According to [Janouk], [liiga] knows and is happy about it.

2009-07-06 [Cia_mar]: Oh good! At least it was not a case of someone swiping her image

2009-07-07 [Paul Doyle]: They better have paid her a good amount to use the image. It's really that good!

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