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Page name: The Necromancer [Logged in view] [RSS]
2009-06-10 13:36:17
Last author: SilverFire
Owner: SilverFire
# of watchers: 4
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D20: 6
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The Necromancer


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I realise this is probably too long, but I didn't want to cut anything out. However, if it's unacceptably long, tell me and I'll try.


Info: It's an alternate universe, so there's no particular time-frame in mind. The peasants have no technology, and look like typical medieval peasants. The Necromancers look a bit more steam-punk.


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Panel 1:

Two young boys in a forest, snow is on the floor, they wear peasant clothing, but not rags. One, slightly smaller, is cheering at the other boy, who has a sling shot drawn back and ready to fire, one eye shut to steady his aim. He's a typical brown-haired, blue-eyed boy. He has a scar on the back of the hand firing the sling-shot. The two boys should be dissimilar entirely in looks, so they're not mistaken for brothers.
Voice: It never crossed my mind before that moment…

Panel 2:

A blackbird on the branch of a tree, being hit by the stone from the slingshot,
Suggestion for shot: From behind the blackbird, looking down on the boys, so we can see that he has fired the slingshot.
Voice: …how it would feel to take a life.

Panel 3:

The two boys, standing over the dead bird, looking horrified.
Voice: It was awful.

Panel 4:

The two boys fleeing from the forest, and the dead bird.

Panel 5:

Scene of cottage at edge of village, setting sun. It's snowy, and there are mountains in the background. (point being to show passage of time, hopefully)

Panel 6:

A woman walking towards the dead bird. I figure it should be drawn from a distance, since it would look better if the woman were a few meters from the bird. It is now night time. The footprints of the boys should be visible, heading in the opposite direction from which the lady comes.

Panel 7:

Woman stopping by bird. I don't really have any specifications for how she should look, but she should be 'different' as it were, in clothes that are perhaps a bit 'goth' or 'punk'. My immediate thought was lots of buckles, but the only thing that matters is that they should be dark.


Panel 8:

The Woman picking the bird up from the snow, she should look slightly sad, but not about to cry.

Panel 9:

The woman, still holding the bird, but now hovering her other hand over it, a golden light going from her fingertips to the bird.

Panel 10:

Close up of the bird in her hand, now alive. If there's a way, it should be made to look un-dead rather than resurrected, but obviously not with bones hanging out, since it's only been dead a few hours. The wound which killed it should still be there. If it's obvious its internal organs haven't been repaired that might be good.

Panel 11:

Woman leaving forest, in the same direction in which the boys left, with bird now perched on her shoulder.

Panel 12:

The bird rapping on a window, it is night, but we should be able to see by moonlight that the boy who killed the bird is sitting up in his bed.

Panel 13:

A gust of wind blows the window open, bringing cold air and snow into the room, the boy is running towards the door, under which light can be seen.

Panel 14:

The boy bangs into the woman who reanimated the bird
Voice: When I first saw her, I thought she was going to kill me.

Panel 15:

The room, dark and now completely empty. The window is still open, with small piles of snow around it, out of the window, the moon can be seen.

Panel 16:

It is now summer. An older woman in peasants clothing is placing a flower by a grave, on top of which rests the slingshot. At the edge of the forest, a young man stands unnoticed. He has brown hair, blue eyes an a scar on the back of his hand. He is wearing the same type of clothing as the mysterious woman.
I suppose in a way, she did.

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Writing For Comics Contest | Silvie's Writing

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2008-06-04 [Ravendust]: Very good, there're a few spelling errors though:

(Author's Note)"However, it it's unacceptably long" Suppose you meant if.

(Panel 1)"who has a sling shot drawn back and read to fire" ready

(Panel 9)"bird, put now hovering " but?

(Panel 16) "I has brown hair, blue eyes " he?

Good luck!^^

2008-06-04 [SilverFire]: Fixed, thanks. :3

2008-06-04 [deeterhi]: very nice :) it's a little long to be honest, but not extremely long. if you want to cut it down some, it wouldn't hurt your chances.

it reminds me of a story i was working on myself, where the witches and wizards in my world were healers. they couldn't resurrect the dead like your necromancer, only heal the wounded, though.

good luck :)

2008-06-04 [SilverFire]: I'll try and think of a few ways to cut it down. :3

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