Page name: Potty Training [Logged in view] [RSS]
2007-07-01 14:30:50
Last author: Firenze
Owner: threelade
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Potty Training Your Child

Welcome to Potty Training Your Child!

Teacher: [threelade]





Brief Outline:

1. Introduction
2. It's Important to Be Calm About Toilet Training.
3. From start to finish, toilet training includes:
4. All right, we now know when to start and we know what the long range goals are so let’s begin
5. After your child understands what to do on the toilet, these steps to potty train can be encouraging
6. Common problems during potty training
7. Punishments When Toilet Training
8. Rewarding Your Child When Potty Training
9. Matter-Of-Fact
10. Away from home, teach your child to recognize rest room signs, and encourage them to use public bathrooms whenever necessary
11. Sitting On The Toilet.
12. If A Toilet Is Not Available
13. Pullups
14. Don't Know What Kind of Words to Use.
15. How to Reward a Child
16. Your Child Tries to Play With the Feces
17. Your Little Boy Insists on Sitting Down to Urinate
18. Your Child Resists Going to the Potty
19. Your Child is Having Accidents
20. Your Child Gets Upset When Stools are Being Flushed Away
21. Bowel Movement or Urinates Right After Being Taken Off the Toilet
22. Your Child Asks For a Diaper When a Bowel Movement is Expected and Hides or Stands in a Special Place
23. Urination While Sleeping
24. Going to the Potty With One Particular Person
25.Don’t Begin Training Until Your Child is Clearly Ready



Before you attempt to toilet train your child make sure he/she is ready because attempting to train a child before they are ready can lead to stress for both parent and child. The following are a list of indicators that your child is ready to attempt to toilet train. All of the signs need not be present but it is a good idea to wait till at least several of the signs are present.

• Your child stays dry for at least two hours during the day and is dry after naps.
• Your child can follow simple instructions.
• Your child takes his clothes off just because he can.
• Your child shows an interest in wearing underwear. 
• Shows obvious signs of discomfort when the diaper is dirtied.
• Bowel movements are regular.
• Expresses an interest in using the toilet or potty seat.
• Indicates through facial expression, posture, or language that he's ready to use the toilet.
• Your child asks to wear grown-up underwear.
• Your child knows where things belong such as his toys.
• When the diaper stays dry more and more often overnight.
• Your child will begin to notice the potty and want to sit on the toilet.
• The child may express displeasure with a wet or dirty diaper, or may not want to wear a diaper anymore.


It's Important to Be Calm About Toilet Training.

Remember that no one can control when and where a child urinates or has a bowel movement except the child. Children at the toilet training age are becoming aware of their individuality and they look for ways to test their limits. Toilet training is a straight forward process with many steps that your child can master with encouragement from you in a fairly short amount of time or if handled wrong can become a battle royal between you and your child.

Once you’re ready to start to potty train, take the child to the bathroom with you, and talk about what you’re doing. Use words to describe what you’re doing that is not offensive or embarrassing to you and be constant. If you start with pee or urinate then stick with those words to describe that part of the process. Too many descriptive words just confuse a young child.

If possible, have your child go to the bathroom with the same-gender parent, so he or she can see and learn the proper mechanics of toileting.


From start to finish, toilet training includes:

1. Telling your child what you expect of him
2. Your child telling you he has to go
3. Undressing
4. Going
5. Wiping
6. Dressing
7. Flushing
8. Hand Washing


All right, we now know when to start and we know what the long range goals are so let’s begin

At first a simple timer is a very handy tool. Set it to go off every two hours and when it does tell your child; (don’t ask) its time to go potty. Take the child to the potty and sit him down on it. Never leave your child unattended when he is on the potty. Never leave him there for more than 5 minutes.

Take some simple toys with you to give him something to do when he is sitting on the potty, talk to him and encourage him.

Run water in the sink at a slow trickle. The sound can sometimes help a child use the toilet.

After he is finished praise him. Tell him he is a good boy/girl. If the child uses the toilet give him additional praise or a reward. Something like a sticker or a hug is a good reward for a job well done but regardless of weather the child has used the potty or not praise for just sitting there like you want him to is always in order.

Help the child wipe himself. For girls remember to teach them to wipe from front to back especially after having a bowel movement to prevent urinary tract infections.

BE FLEXABLE If you see your child get red in the face and become quiet take heed. Likewise if the child hides or begins making grunting noises or looks like he is straining get him to the potty right away.


After your child understands what to do on the toilet, these steps to potty train can be encouraging:

• Provide a potty chair that is low to the ground so that the child’s feet touch the floor.
• Set up a schedule for setting your child on the potty chair and stick to it.
• Ask your child regularly to go to the bathroom, and encourage them to tell you when they need to go.
• When your child does go in the potty, be sure to reward, should your child fail to go in the potty, don't scold or punish him or her.
• Once your child has been successful at toileting a few times, consider dressing them in cotton underwear so that they become aware of being wet or dry.
• Continue toilet training even if you go on outings.
• When your child has learned to use the toilet consistently during the day, you may be able to take off the diapers at night.
• Your child may be ready to begin when the diaper stays dry more and more often overnight.
• Your child will begin to notice the potty and want to sit on the toilet.
• The child may express displeasure with a wet or dirty diaper, or may not want to wear a diaper anymore.



The Toilet Terrors
The toilet thing noisy and where does the stuff go? What if I get flushed away! OH MY! What if there are monsters in there? Even talking about such toilet terrors and imaginary possibilities is scary...some kids just don't want to try anymore or talk about it. Some kids begin to hold it all in for a while, and then experience pain when they finally do go.

If your child experiences any toilet terrors then give the potty training a break. Continue to take the child to the bathroom with you and continue to encourage him but don’t force him. Let him see you flush your bowel movements away, take the top off the tank and let him look at what’s in there. Talk to him, play games with a doll sitting on the toilet as a way to show your child that it’s ok to use the toilet.

Stress can have a negative effect on potty training. If your house is under a lot of stress then it is best to wait till things settle down before beginning potty training. If potty training has begun and something happens to cause large amounts of stress for the child then watch him. If he wants to return to the diaper for a short time than let him. It will save problems for you in the long run and it will save anguish for your child.

The following are a list of common stress factors that often negatively affect potty training.

• Your family has just moved or will move in the near future.
• You are expecting a baby or you have recently had a new baby.
• There is a major illness, a recent death, or some other family crisis.

However, if your child is learning how to use the toilet without problems, there is no need to stop because of these situations.


Punishments When Toilet Training.

Do not use negative reinforcements (verbal reprimands, punishments or spankings) when the child has an accident or wets the bed. Toddlers do not use association the way older children do. Negative reinforcements may serve to make your child afraid of even trying to use the potty.


Rewarding Your Child When Potty Training.

Hugs, praise, or small rewards all help to reinforce the behavior. If an accident happens, simply clean it up and encourage your child to keep trying then move on to another activity without making a fuss.



Avoid giving too many drinks before bedtime, and make sure he or she uses the toilet so that they will not wet the bed. Above all else, remain calm about the entire process. Keeping in mind that accidents will happen, and when they do, avoid making a fuss or criticizing your child


Away from home, teach your child to recognize rest room signs, and encourage them to use public bathrooms whenever necessary.

Every child under the age of 5 should be accompanied by an adult when using a public restroom. Teach your child to pull down his or her own under pants. A boy should also learn to use his pants' fly front. To simplify these lessons, dress your child in clothes that can easily be undone without help. Elastic-waisted pants or shorts are generally the most practical clothing at this stage of potty training.


Sitting On The Toilet.


Little boys just like little girls generally sit down to urinate during the early potty training toilet stage, but as pre-schoolers they'll begin to copy their fathers, friends, or older brothers, and stand up while urinating. As your child learns to do this, make sure he lifts the toilet seat beforehand. Be prepared to do some extra cleaning around the toilet bowl for a while, since he probably won't have perfect aim for some time.


If A Toilet Is Not Available

Your child will need to learn that before a long trip, to try and use a bathroom to go potty, even if they don't really feel a strong need at the time. In many cases a bathroom will not be available or just not close enough, when it's really needed, so you should teach your child to urinate outdoors. This may come in handy for other occasions. When learning to potty train, your child may not and is not recommended, to hold urination. This isn't a problem for little boys, but little girls must learn to squat so their feet and clothing are out of the way. You can help your daughter by showing her the appropriate position and physically supporting her as she squats.



They seem like a good idea but they are designed to keep wetness away from your child. Using panties on your child makes him more aware of being wet or soiled.


Don't Know What Kind of Words to Use.

Your child should clearly understand what “pee,” “poop,” “dry,” “wet,” “clean,” “messy,” and “potty” mean. Teach your child these words and routinely use them during the potty training stage.


How to Reward a Child.

Praise or reward your child for cooperation or any success. All cooperation and efforts should be praised. For example, you might say, “You are sitting on the potty just like Mommy,” or “You’re trying real hard to put the pee-pee in the potty.” If your child urinates into the potty, you can rewarded them. Although a sense of accomplishment is enough for some children, others need treats to stay focused. Treats like raisins, animal crackers, fruit slices or stickers, as well as praise and hugs. Save the big reward for the day that your child goes to the potty and uses it without help or encouragement. On that day a trip to the ice-cream or candy store is in order.


Your Child Tries to Play With the Feces.

Be understanding, but firm, and without upsetting your child simply say, "No. this is not something you are allowed to play with."


Your Little Boy Insists on Sitting Down to Urinate.

The majority of boys will want to sit while learning to potty train. After learning to urinate sitting down, and when he has mastered bladder control, communicate by explaining to him that he is a big boy and can go potty standing up. He may pick this up on his own, or as he sees his daddy or other male friends or family members going to the bathroom.


Your Child Resists Going to the Potty.

Resistance usually means, it's possible that it's just not the right time to start potty training. In cases where your child is older than five years old and you observe your child seems to need to urinate or have a bowel movement, try taking him to the potty. Keeping your child seated on the potty for only a few minutes at a time, and communicating with your child what it is you want to happen and why. Be casual and calm toned with your voice. If he protests strongly, don't insist.


Your Child is Having Accidents.

In the beginning your child will have more accidents than successes but accidents are not unheard of for up to a year after potty training. Regardless of when your child has an accident stay calm and don’t scold. Just help the child clean up and encourage him to keep trying. If the accident happens after he has learned to use the potty remind him of how well he has been doing.


Your Child Gets Upset When Stools are Being Flushed Away.

Some children believe that their waste is part of their body. A child usually feels very scared and frightened in this stage. It's a hard thing for them to understand. Explain to your child the purpose of body waste, and the body's need to eliminate it into the toilet. Try having your child say "good bye poop", while flushing and easing the stress with a happy toned voice. Or try hand waving good bye to their own poop. This can reverse the reaction to a positive one, and can make a fun game.


Bowel Movement or Urinates Right After Being Taken Off the Toilet.

This happens early in the potty training stages. It really takes time for your child to learn how to relax the muscles that control the bowel and bladder. If this happens a lot, it may mean your child is just not really ready for potty training. Try again in a few weeks.


Your Child Asks For a Diaper When a Bowel Movement is Expected and Hides or Stands in a Special Place.

Your child has the ability to briefly postpone urinating or having a bowel movement. They may go off and hide and come back wet or soiled, or may wake up from naps dry. This indicates there is physical readiness but, may not be emotionally ready to be potty trained. This is not a failure to potty training, this lets you know that your child is recognizing the bowel signals. Think positively and keep suggesting that he or she have the bowel movement in the bathroom on the potty.


Urination While Sleeping.

Nap-time and nighttime toilet training like most children, will take a little longer. Encourage your toddler to use the potty immediately before going to bed and as soon as they wake up. Communicate to your child that in the middle of the night if they have to use the toilet, they can call for you or get you up to help them go to the potty at night or nap time.


Going to the Potty With One Particular Person.

This is very normal with most children. If your child will only go potty with you, gradually withdraw yourself from the process. You can offer to wait with your child, and help get them undressed, or walk your child to the bathroom. But wait outside the door and pop your face in and out of the bathroom just enough times so that your child knows you are real close if they need any help.


Don’t Begin Training Until Your Child is Clearly Ready.

Readiness does not just happen; it involves concepts and skills you can begin teaching your child.
From your child's perspective, toilet training can be scary, confusing and inconvenient. All his life your child has been taken care of, and his dependence on you has been a warm and comforting experience. You have used the opportunity during diapering to sing to him or her, smile down at him, and connect.

Now, after about two or more years in warm, comfortable diapers, he is expected to SUDDENLY take care of this task himself. He must stop in the middle of his very important activities and shed his warm clothing and sit on a cold seat. Then he must figure out how to make that thing down there work... on purpose! And in a sitting position now! All this while his activities await. At first it seemed like a fun, this new activity they call Potty Training.... Then when he does get something out, he must flush it away.

It may help you to remember that what you are trying to teach your child is not natural or normal. We were not born with underpants on and we were not born knowing that poop goes in the potty; the natural way would be without panties and go when you feel the need. The socially acceptable way is to use the toilet and that’s what you need to capitalize on. Being socially acceptable.


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