Number of voters: 260
Voting only open to members of private forum number -2493
Number of votes: 137 (53%)
b) [Sagacious Turkey]
Number of votes: 32 (12%)
c) Mort again!
Number of votes: 27 (10%)
Number of votes: 9 (3%)
e) [Hedda] *cough* loser *cough*
Number of votes: 36 (14%)
f) [Nekko fox]
Number of votes: 3 (1%)
g) [Mortified Penguin]
Number of votes: 13 (5%)
h) [~Crimson Angel~]
Number of votes: 3 (1%)
26.6 cpd/9709 cpy
18.6 cpd/6789 cpy
15.2 cpd/5548 cpy
15.3 cpd/5580 cpy
14.6 cpd/5333 cpy
13.5 cpd/4924 cpy
13.6 cpd/4972 cpy
12.5 cpd/4563 cpy
11.4 cpd/4165 cpy
10.5 cpd/3824 cpy
09.6 cpd/3512 cpy
08.9 cpd/3237 cpy
08.3 cpd/3017 cpy
2018-01-15 [Nuktae-tal]: I'm a people too!!
2018-01-15 [Mortified Penguin]: We don't serve people here.
2018-01-15 [Nuktae-tal]: I mean... uuuhhh I'm a wolf!
2018-01-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Gray Wolf or Timber Wolf?!
2018-01-16 [Pied Crow]: What if it's Grey Wolf?
2018-01-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Wikipedia said it was 'gray'. Wikipedia wouldn't lie to me.
2018-01-16 [Pied Crow]: You should take into account every search result when fact checking! All 1,000,000 of them! It is the only way to maintain true accuracy!
2018-01-16 [Nuktae-tal]: I'm a red wolf?! Or black... might be purple I don't remember now
2018-01-18 [Pied Crow]: Speak carefully... Mort is well-informed.
2018-01-18 [Nuktae-tal]: Moist what am i?!
2018-01-18 [Sheamus Finn]: a cake? Cause otherwise this might get X-rated fast.....
2018-01-18 [Nuktae-tal]: I don't see the tentacles yet so I think we are good.
2018-01-18 [Mortified Penguin]: The fuck is a wolf?! *eats a handful of ramen*
*snorts some of the noodles up through his nostrils*
Where the hell is my crackpipe?! *scratches his teeth*
2018-01-18 [Mortified Penguin]: AAAAAAHHHHHH!! *rips off his suit, revealing several flailing tentacles and one that's just sort of dangling there unenthusiastic
2018-01-19 [Nuktae-tal]: Oh god cover that thing will you?! There are children!
2018-01-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *the unenthusiastic one suddenly perks up*
2018-01-19 [Pied Crow]: テンタクル？ 興味ないね… >_>
2018-01-19 [Nuktae-tal]: *offers blow up dolls of Mickey mouse and Minnie to tentacles.* whose some good tentacles you are!
2018-01-19 [Mortified Penguin]: あなたはなれます。
*the tentacles eat some ramen*
2018-01-20 [Pied Crow]: Too small for my tastes, Penguin. I need at least two hundred feet.
2018-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: But tentacles don't have feet. They do wear socks though. And have toes. And fingernails. Not toenails! Fingernails. Also toenails. On their feet.
2018-01-21 [Nuktae-tal]: I wish I had fingernails on my toes... that would be nice.
2018-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: So do I. And so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us. *nods wisely as he gently strokes a crooning midget*
2018-01-21 [Pied Crow]: Huh, I was half-right about how you were gonna react to that. Looks like I don't quite have you pegged, Sir Penguin.
2018-01-21 [Pied Crow]: Ah, and that thing at the bottom says there are 40003 comments! What a nice, non-symbolic number.....
2018-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: But did you see this coming...?!
*makes no joke about pegging*
*pats himself on the back for posting yet another hilarious comment*
*secretly wipes all the blood on his hand off on himself*
Heh heh, sucker...
2018-01-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *dunks a mop into the soup and starts mopping the floor*
*mops the potted plants as well*
*wrings the mop out in the soup, snaps it in half, and tosses both halves in the soup as well*
*washes his hands off in the soup*
That's enough work for this week. *takes $2000 out of the register and strolls out the door*
2018-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: MY CARPET!! Do you have any idea how hard it is to get soup stains out of carpet?! Not very.
*takes $2.7 million out of the register and sets fire to the diner before dashing out the door*
2018-01-22 [Sheamus Finn]: *watches as Mortified Penguin rushes out the front and in the rear door of the diner*
"We all order down here...." says the clown at the counter
*hits clown with frying pan*
No, we don't have the money for that cameo silly clown....
2018-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't hit Misty with my frying pan! I just washed that several years ago.
2018-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]:
2018-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]:
2018-01-22 [Pied Crow]: You can't burn the diner down! Where else can I go to wait for backyard bread crumbs?!
2018-01-22 [Nuktae-tal]: We wouldn't waste good crumbs on you!! *throws worm and maggot filled bread out the back door*
2018-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: MY GOURMET BREAD!
2018-01-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts back in and takes a seat at the bar*
Gallon of whiskey, please.
*hands the bartender a used napkin with "one dollur" written on it in crayon, but it promptly catches fire*
There seems to be more fire in here than usual.
2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I hadn't really noticed. *smolders*
2018-01-23 [Pied Crow]: *dines on a worm-maggot sandwich*
2018-01-23 [Nuktae-tal]: Me either *uses flame thrower to kill a small child unattended by it's parent.*
2018-01-23 [Infested_Zling]: *looks around blankly before taking a seat* something... edible, please
2018-01-23 [Nuktae-tal]: *Smashes bread with hammer and chisel*
2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws the bread in the garbage disposal and starts slicing up the hammer*
2018-01-23 [Nuktae-tal]: My penis! *grabs salami and smacks Most with it*
2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Most, NNOOOOO! *cradles his dying body*
He was my sixth best friend...
*shrugs and starts slicing him up as well*
2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *dumps the pile of Most and hammer slices into a plastic bag and flings the bag up onto the roof*
There you go, Infested_Peen. That'll be $600.
2018-01-23 [DarkRedKrueger]: Better go and fetch your food infested-peen.
2018-01-23 [Infested_Zling]: *sneakily slides him $599* ill ah, ill go get my bag of most... and hammer slices. or should i let it cook longer?
2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: NO REFUNDS!
*karate chops FreddyKrueger'
2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: AND STAY OFF MY ROOF!
2018-01-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: But does anyone ever wonder what happened to the little elves that used to make everyone's shoes??? I hate having to go steal from the shoe store/funeral home nowadays. ;(
2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I just don't wear shoes anymore.
*points at his bloodied, mangled feet, covered in shards of glass and snails*
2018-01-24 [Nuktae-tal]: I just eat shoes *passes around shoe jerky tongues.*
2018-01-25 [Pied Crow]: Whoaaa, Penguin! Are you sure having that on your feet is legal?
2018-01-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, probably. But severing that guy's feet and feeding them to my snails probably wasn't... I wonder why he was walking in gl- HEY, WHAT THE FUCK?! *picks up one of the snails*
THIS ISN'T A SNAIL, IT'S JUST A SLUG WITH A CHIP STUCK TO ITS BACK!
*violently rips the snail's shell off and hurls it into traffic, causing a car to swerve and crash into a school bus*
2018-01-25 [Nuktae-tal]: Hahahaha turbo snails... * eats es car go*
2018-01-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Please don't eat my friends. :(
2018-01-25 [Pied Crow]: ... Let us get back to you on that.
Hey! No one's written up a friscal report for six years! Need we ask why?
2018-01-25 [Nuktae-tal]: Hey no Gerry frisky up here!
2018-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I'M GETTING AROUND TO IT. I'm also getting around to changing the daily specials.
2018-01-26 [Pied Crow]: Who knows why, but I did the tedious copy-pasta work for you.
Pay me in either macro sergals or dragons.
2018-01-27 [Pied Crow]: Is that an exaggerated otherkin joke I see in there? Very promising!
2018-01-28 [Nuktae-tal]: A what who now?
2018-01-28 [Pied Crow]: We thought we were a therianthrope for a while, until we realized we were insulting therians everywhere. Now, we have a feathersona instead!
2018-01-28 [Nuktae-tal]: Feathers? Like a dinosaur?
2018-01-28 [Sideways]: Bob’s Diner needs a discord server. Badly
2018-01-28 [Pied Crow]: Discord server? I don't see the advantage, other than being accessible through Skype's replacement.
2018-01-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *roars and eats a customer's head... prudently*
2018-01-29 [Pied Crow]: Mr. Turkey...! Are you...trying to seduce me?!
2018-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats another customer's head... sensually*
2018-01-29 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm pretty sure a discord server would take away from the true diner's friscal earnings.
2018-01-30 [Pied Crow]: Turkey, you're such a beast! Now, pin me to the ground and growl at me, menacingly!
2018-01-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pins you to the ground and charges you $12.99 for an extra packet of (used) ketchup... menacingly*
2018-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]: MY PERSONAL KETCHUP STASH!
2018-01-31 [Yuriona]: Is it Dijon ketchup at least?
2018-01-31 [Pied Crow]: Everything's good with dinosaurs, HEEEELP!!!
Er, I mean... Nice try, but I only ever bring five dollars with me on small trips like this!
2018-01-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: Only five dollars?! Get off me, whore, I'm saving myself for marriage! *violently hurls Pie Crow into the oven*
*spots a wealthy looking old woman, fumbling through her purse for some old person candy*
Mmm... hey, baby, you look like you can afford my shipping and handling fees. Let's get a look at those prehistoric gams... *starts feeling up her prunes and even her raisins*
2018-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats pre-wrapped dijon ramen*
2018-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait... GRANNY, NNNOOOOOOO!
GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY INHERITANCE!
2018-01-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *starts groping her with his feet*
2018-01-31 [Pied Crow]: Put a fork in me, I'm done.
2018-01-31 [Pied Crow]: (I'm sure you've never heard that before!)
2018-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: I've never heard anything before, I'm blind. Now get back in the oven, gazpacho takes at least twelve hours.
*shoves Cro (I'm too lazy to add the 'w') back into the oven and duct tapes it shut*
2018-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *hangs some inspirational informational artwork in the bathroom, over the trough*
2018-01-31 [Nuktae-tal]: Meow
2018-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *slaps the hell out of the cat*
YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE CATCHING THE MICE IN THE KITCHEN! *points at a gang of possums, crouched threateningly and wielding nunchuks and katanas*
Also, stop eating my lasagna...
2018-02-01 [Nuktae-tal]: *whips out whips and whips self with whips in hand.*
2018-02-01 [Mortified Penguin]: B-but... cats don't do that... they don't even have hands... and seldom self-flagellat
2018-02-01 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT ANTARCTICA, CAT?!
*pulls out a knife*
TELL ME AND I'LL LET YOU HAVE THIS REALLY COOL KNIFE!!
2018-02-01 [Pied Crow]: Well...? Is it safe to come out?
2018-02-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *kicks the oven*
SHUT UP IN THERE, WE'RE HAVING A CONVERSATION! I SAID TWELVE MORE HOURS!!
2018-02-01 [Nuktae-tal]: The Antarctic is very cold... and sort of North... depending on your point of view.
2018-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm, sounds factual. *hands over the deed to the knife*
2018-02-02 [Nuktae-tal]: Yes! * whips deed into shape... of a star*
2018-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...
*stabs you with the knife*
2018-02-02 [Pied Crow]: Oh, I see how it is. I know when I've been insulted! I know when I've been insulted!
*over-exerts self and passes out*
2018-02-02 [~Crimson Angel~]:
2018-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]:
2018-02-02 [Pied Crow]: Sorry, I'm not into humans with knives.
Um, and I'm not good with forum games. Talking with degenerate birds is the most social activity I do for leisure these days.
*cooks for another 12 hours*
2018-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his bible*
I'm not degenerate.
*goes back to eating his bible*
2018-02-04 [Nuktae-tal]: Hay now! *throws hay in the air.*
2018-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *a cute, sweet pony looks visibly upset at the waste of all that perfectly good hay*
HAY! Get back in that meat grinder!
*shoves Misty into the meat grinder*
*gathers up all the loose hay and feeds it to the happy pony*
2018-02-05 [Pied Crow]: Hooray for birds!
2018-02-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Nobody likes birds. *spits in the bird bath in the middle of the diner*
2018-02-06 [Nuktae-tal]: *builds crows nest in ceiling fan and settles in comfortably* aye captain.
2018-02-06 [Pied Crow]: Hmm, let's think about this... What kind of ceiling fan would Bob's Diner install?
2018-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: You'd think it'd be something funny, like a helicopter propeller or something, but it isn't. It's just a regular old fan.
*turns it on, messing up several spider webs and launching a number of angry spiders into the air*
See? Lame. Though, it is impressive we managed to install a ceiling fan with no ceiling...
*the fan starts sparking up and spinning wildly out of control*
*it catches fire and detaches from the nonexistent ceiling*
*the flaming fan flies throughout the diner, flinging furious fiery spiders and decapitating a number of screaming, terrified patrons*
Laaaaame... *casually goes back to reading the paper*
2018-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *circles an ad looking for new ShareBlue employees to shill Bob's Diner*
Hey, have you guys heard about this awesome Hillary guy? Totally better than Drumpf! And I'm like 80% sure she isn't a reptilian... But in all seriousness, we can't let that man near the nuclear codes.
*starts screaming incomprehensib
*five cents is deposited into my account*
2018-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Roll Tide!
But seriously though, they shouldn't have messed up my order...
2018-02-07 [Nuktae-tal]: Sad days...
2018-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: The nights are also sad too as well...
2018-02-07 [Pied Crow]: Hey. Don't joke about people being reptilians. We take that stuff seriously! Don't get our hopes up!!
2018-02-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: Taco Bell apparently has fries now, which is weird...
2018-02-07 [Pied Crow]: Oh. Yeah, nacho fries! They must be advertised well, everyone's talking about them.
2018-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I tried to order some, but apparently they were out and just gave me chips instead... Hence, the arson my lawyer keeps telling me to stop "bragging about" and "admitting to"... that fire was pretty nifty though.
2018-02-08 [Nuktae-tal]: That's because they were my fries nachos...
2018-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]:
2018-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]:
2018-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *shrugs and just grows his own nacho potato tree*
2018-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts in, brandishing a pile of cash threateningly*
HAND OVER THE SPECIAL AND TWO ORDERS OF THE MORE EXPENSIVE COOKED SUSHI OR ELSE!!
2018-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I TOLD YOU, WE DON'T NEGOTIATE WITH TERRORISTS!
Anyway, it was good doing business with you, Achmed. *hands him a large box labeled, "BOMBS - for rats"*
Good luck with your infid- er, rat problem. *tips his hat*
2018-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Waaaiiiit a second... you don't have a hat!
*immediately calls the police*
Yeah, I was trying to rob this shithole and this guy here has a really suspicious hat. Yeah. Uh huh. My name? My location?! MY HIP SIZE?! Sorry, wrong number. Bye, I love you too.
*slams the rotary phone into the wall*
A swat team should be arriving soon to arrest everyone except me.
2018-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *glances at the clock on the wall*
Aaaany minute now...
2018-02-09 [Pied Crow]: Mort!
... What happened to your pocket knife?
2018-02-09 [Nuktae-tal]: Hands up!! I'm the police! *rips off pants and begins to strip tease*
2018-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: This one...?
*starts to pull out his pocket knife, but is promptly gunned down by several naked police officers*
2018-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *the police surround Mort's corpse and start putting his hat in cuffs*
*they also cuff Mort's corpse's lips*
*shrugs and goes back to reading his paper*
2018-02-10 [Pied Crow]: People? But, this isn't a village!
2018-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Your Village People joke disgusts me. Those men are heroes, don't be disrespectful. *angrily spits on one of the police officers, who runs away crying*
As of before this comment, here are the most frequent words that appear in Bob's Diner:
2018-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Here are some random 'f' words that were only ever used once:
2018-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Now they will have appeared at least twice!
2018-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: There have been 54,322 asterisks.
2018-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Here are some other alleged, useless statistics:
Number of words: 723898
Number of full stops: 37575
Number of long words (7 or more characters): 117777
Number of words per full stop: 19.26541583499
Percentage long words: 16.26983359534
Lix (readability): 35.53524943033
Number of different words: 42530.0
Lexical variety: 0.059
2018-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Though, LibreOffice claims there are 629,953 words. And 330 Asian characters and Korean syllables.
2018-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: The current comment count for this friscal year (including this one) is:
[Mortified Penguin] 388
[Pied Crow] 92
[Sagacious Turkey] 83
[Mrs. No_One] 45
[~Crimson Angel~] 14
[Sheamus Finn] 13
[Nekko fox] 6
[Delta Operator] 1
[Emily June] 1
[Alexi Ice] 1
[Wulf Skjaldr] 1
2018-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: That's 895 comments (not including this one) so far for an average of 5.496932515337
2018-02-11 [Sheamus Finn]: 896
2018-02-11 [Sheamus Finn]: 897 lol
2018-02-11 [Pied Crow]: Nice, good to see bird got in! .... But, why CHAD? Is it spoilers?
2018-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Here's a list of words and the frequency of their appearance in the place where a username would typically go on a comment (basically the overall approximate comment count for each user with more than like 50 comments):
2018-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: What the actual comment count for each person is, I have no idea. LibreOffice sucks.
2018-02-11 [Sheamus Finn]: So, is it better to post often or just when you have a long drawn out post?
2018-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: BOTH.
2018-02-11 [Nuktae-tal]: So what you are saying if I understand this correctly is that each individual person who visits and posts on this site needs to do so in a long winded and yet comprehensible manner but frequently as well on top of that. And now even when we do post we need to be mindful of the wordings that we use to explain the point of our monologue in the first place!
2018-02-11 [Pied Crow]: Yeah, and I'm worried about what's around my name...
2018-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: BRICKY, NNNO-
Wait, that's Brickie with an 'ie'. I hate that bricktch. Carry on.
2018-02-12 [Nuktae-tal]: *sweeps up brick dust and puts it into the meatloaf.* gotta give this bitch some texture. Bitches love texture.
2018-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Where'd you get that broom?! We don't serve brooms here!
2018-02-13 [Pied Crow]: "Oh... This looks bad."
2018-02-13 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU look bad! *shoves a cigarette*
2018-02-13 [Mortified Penguin]: It's that Yuriona skank's birthday! *punts a cake out the window*
2018-02-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Now I'm hungry... :(
2018-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *punts Yuriona out the window*
2018-02-14 [Yuriona]: Didn't have cake. Had black forest pancakes instead! :D *grabs plate on her way out the window*
2018-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: All I got for my birthday was a cup of ramen with a candle in it. Not one of those tiny birthday candles, but one of those big ass candles in a jar. It was jammed down in there. Caught the styrofoam on fire. My house burnt down. I lost seven cats that day. Also, my wife and kids, I guess, but I was bored of them anyway.
2018-02-15 [Pied Crow]: Oh! Black forest pancakes? Those are completely...u
2018-02-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Or are they butter flavored vegetable oil spread-y?
2018-02-15 [Nuktae-tal]: Isn't that chocolate?
2018-02-16 [Sheamus Finn]: I've seen pictures....an
2018-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Nah, track 7 goes to Pound Town.
*picks up some cute puppies that weigh one pound from the Pound Town pound for only a pound*
2018-02-16 [Yuriona]: Chocolate pancakes with whipped cream and cherries to be precises. *sits on tree branch eating cake stuck on another branch* And the train for Diabetes Train is track 2. Everyone knows that.
2018-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Stop avoiding the question! Are they buttery or are they butter flavored vegetable oil spread-y?!
2018-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid people of Bob's Diner! You've been arbitrarily selected to be Mort's Member of the Month for the month of Second July™! First question: ARE THEY BUTTERY OR ARE THEY BUTTER FLAVORED VEGETABLE OIL SPREAD-Y?!
2018-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: WELL, SHEAMUS?! ANSWER ME, BOY.
2018-02-17 [Sheamus Finn]: From what I saw...no butter...just brown chocolatey sauce everywhere....
2018-02-17 [Pied Crow]: Now I wanna ride one!
2018-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Second question: What's a good second question?
2018-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Third question: ANSWER ME, DAMN YOU!
2018-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Fifth question: *angrily flips a table*
2018-02-17 [Yuriona]: Definitely buttery. And chocolatey.
2018-02-18 [Pied Crow]: We have conflicting reports, sir. How should we proceed?
2018-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I think it's pretty clear Yuri is lying about this alleged "butter" nonsense. Sheamus wouldn't lie to me, he told me he never lies!
2018-02-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: It's true, he also told me to get a liberal arts degree, which is how I ended up being so rich and famous.
*puts [Yuriona] in cuffs for her heinous crimes and hauls her off to Bob's Family Detention Center and Broom Closet*
Don't touch my brooms in there, criminal scum.
*crawls back into his decrepit hovel out back, before the pigeons pilfer his dinner rats again*
2018-02-18 [Nuktae-tal]: *silently eats a salad*
2018-02-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Get your hands off my expensive crabgrass!
2018-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: This interview sucks!
2018-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: -tal]! Ask some hard hitting questions!
2018-02-18 [Nuktae-tal]: Kay!! How fast would a train from Cleveland travel if it wasn't a locomotive at all on a free way made of jello?!
2018-02-18 [Yuriona]: Hmm... I wonder which of these brooms is the fastest broom. I'll need to make a quick getaway for sure. *examines brooms*
You forgot your bracelets by the way. *holds up cuffs* I have too many pairs already.
2018-02-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: That mahogany broom in there used to be the fastest, but it blew a head gasket.
Also, which flavor of Jello?
2018-02-19 [Sheamus Finn]: Wait...wait...
2018-02-19 [Yuriona]: Head gasket huh? I might be able to fix that.
2018-02-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm pretty sure it needs an engine swap at this point. And a new radiator. Not to mention, it has all kinds of electrical issues and the CD changer doesn't even work. I really think we need to just upgrade to a mop, they've got much better mileage and maintenance doesn't cost nearly as much.
2018-02-20 [Sagacious Turkey]:
2018-02-20 [Sagacious Turkey]:
2018-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: You can't post pictures in an interview! I hate you all...
2018-02-21 [Nuktae-tal]: We love you though Mort. Also the jelly flavor is bananas because they have a bad reputation.
2018-02-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...!!
(17h ago) [Mortified Penguin]: Wait now it's jelly and not Jello?! Get your story straight! Don't make me have to arrest Yuri again!